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The Importance of Joseph
By Hasjiah Evans This contribution is in response to two items in recent editions of Reminders of Reality. I once had a very spiritual experience about Joseph after praying in front of a very small statue of Mary in someone's house. When I went back into the other room my friend Nonita said out of the blue, "We must never forget the importance of Joseph in the life of Jesus"! I was astounded; it was if she knew what I had experienced. This lady was a member of St James church in Vancouver and a deeply spiritual person (not in Subud), Incidentally from the moment she had married Harley when very young she had been extremely ill; he was totally devoted to her and it was my privilege to know them both, and to experience their spirituality and their devotion to God and each other. I can also relate to the experience of being asked if you were you willing to experience various things in the life you were about to enter. When I first had cancer 14 years ago, I woke up one morning sobbing after dreaming that an angelic being was holding up a scroll with what I was about to experience. I fell back asleep and again awoke sobbing after seeing another scroll. (I believe this may have been what is referred to as the Akashic Record). Two deeply traumatic things happened to me during this period of cancer, which I felt reflected the experience of the two scrolls. I survived the cancer very successfully with surgery and no other treatment, despite being told I had only two years to live. Then Jesus appeared to me, healing me and removing the fear of death. - - - - - “You will be Made Whole” By Emmanuel Elliott Hasjiah’s sharing reminds me of an experience I had many years ago, in which an angel appeared to me bearing an armful of scrolls. “These represent the suffering you have go through,” the angel told me, and within a few hours I was stricken with the most painful sciatica imaginable. One health challenge after another ensued, tight up the present day’s rather extreme instances, in relation to which I have received, “You will be made whole.” - - - - - The Birds By Anonymous There have been times when confirmation, messages and signs come to me through birds, but although I'm aware of these happenings at the time, I usually don't know the meaning. An extraordinary example of this occurred a few days ago. I've been requested to teach an art workshop with an Australian Aboriginal theme, and as always I do a smallish painting in preparation. This particular theme was a first for me and I'm not Indigenous so before commencing, I asked for permission, guidance also to be culturally respectful. There are many Magpies around so I decided to do a dot painting depicting a Magpie and call it 'Magpie Dreaming.' Being in lockdown seems to agree with me. First of all it's my default position and it seems to produce a more peaceful environment in which to paint. After the background had dried, I started on the Magpie and that's when I noticed that the noise from the birds outside was building up. I'd left the door open as it was such a beautiful sunny day and I listened to them as I continued to paint. Then I realised that many varieties were out there singing; even the little birds were having their say, whereas the bigger ones usually dominate the scene. This was such a happy day for me, full of joy, and although I was tempted to go and see what was happening with the birds because it sounded so unusual, (imagine about fifty birds singing at the top of their range!). I carried on painting because once I start I tend to be very focussed. Eventually a neighbour walked past and called through the doorway "It's like Hitchcock's movie 'The Birds' out here. Come and look; every fence paling all the way along the fence has a magpie sitting on it singing!" So I broke away and had a look. Sure enough, there they were all lined up, and around me were three other species all singing along as well. It was terrifically loud, like a celebration, and reminded me of a chorus. I thought of Bapak and the fact that this is their worship of God. But why the gathering and the incredible volume of sound? No idea, but it was obviously meaningful. It didn't occur to me that it might be connected to the painting or the fact that I'd asked for permission. I continued happily painting until finished and by day's end they'd quietened down and most had flown away. I shared this amazing experience of the birds by email with my Subud penpal in the UK who said he'd like to see the painting, so I photographed 'Magpie Dreaming' on the ipad and sent it to him. It had such a powerful impact on him that he asked to buy it, adding that he would be privileged to be its custodian. Later after we arranged the transaction, he let me know that he'd felt "an immediate response to what came across as a primeval, timeless depiction." I still needed a painting for the workshop and so I painted the same again the following day, but this time there was no reaction at all from the birds. Apparently there was to be just that one special day when the act of painting a Magpie caused a chain reaction of experiences for myself, a neighbour and a Subud brother living on the other side of the world. It seems to have been an inner experience for all of us including the birds! - - - - - Accidental Opening? By Anonymous When I was fairly new in Subud, I met a lady at an evening class who said that she sensed something around me. Aware that she was sensing the Latihan, I told her that I'm a Subud member and a little about the Latihan. She didn't ask questions, but later told me that she wanted the Latihan and not Subud as she had no wish to join any organisation. This was a sensitive lady, a psychotherapist - let's call her Sue. Later I spoke to an international helper about people wanting the Latihan but not Subud and the reply was that if they're still rebellious then perhaps they're not ready - or words to that effect. One day Sue asked to visit me at home and while we were sitting opposite each other drinking tea and having a light chat - nothing deep- she suddenly stopped talking and shut her eyes for several minutes and I saw tears roll down her cheeks. I waited quietly. When she could speak again, Sue explained that everything had suddenly gone silent and still and she'd had a strong experience. Apparently she'd just been shown that we two had sat opposite each other like this on oriental divans in an ancient past. I didn't have a clue about all that, but had definitely felt something happen. (In fact I was wondering whether Sue had just been accidentally opened) A few times in the past, Sue had commented that I remind her of a fellow therapist she'd trained with, who had a similar feeling around her and she now mentioned that lady's name. This was a surprise, because I'd actually met the lady in question, who was a Subud member who used to travel with Bapak and Ibu. This was now unfolding in the way that synchronistic life experiences tend to do when I go with the flow. It occurred to me that Sue could in fact have already been partly opened years before. I accepted her offer of a therapy session and on the appointed day, the therapy involved me sitting in one chair as one character then crossing to another chair as another. It was long ago and I don't remember the name of this therapy or much about it. What I do remember was that at one point, I spoke the unexpected words "She drives me to Latihan". When the session was over, Sue told me that there had been an old Indonesian lady inside me participating in all of this and it was she who had spoken those words. Had she been interviewing my inner? I had not been aware of anything much, just going through the motions and doing as I was told. I can be quite thick at times; however,if I need to know something, then I 'know.' Before I departed, Sue asked me would I please attend a meditation group she belonged to, give them a talk about Subud and possibly open them? I politely declined and listened with interest to the explanation I gave ( or was it the old Indonesian lady giving it?) That meditation would sit on top of the Latihan and hold it at the material/ mind level not allowing it to progress through the vegetable, animal and human levels to the higher realms. - - - - - A Brother’s Struggle By Anonymous Many years ago I had a dream. In the dream I was shown that a Subud brother I knew was struggling with his homosexuality. He was married and had children and was trying to hide his nature, particularly from his wife. When I woke up I wondered if there was reality in this or if it was just a dream. That day I was going to a Subud gathering. This brother and his family attended the meeting as well. When walking towards the dining hall with my then teenage daughter she told me out of the blue how sad she thought it must be for this brother's wife that her husband was gay. 'How on earth did you know that?' I asked her. She looked surprised and said, 'Doesn't everybody know that? It is so obvious.' If it was true, I didn't really wanted to know this though. What was the purpose? It felt like a burden. I forgot about it soon as I only saw him once every few years. Years later, to my surprise, we ended up in the same Subud group where he caused problems because of his incredibly arrogant and self-righteous behaviour. Several members found him disturbing. His latihan was peculiar: it seemed like a repetitive show of piousness. After a while the penny dropped. His unusual behaviour was likely to compensate for feelings of inferiority and insecurity related to his struggle with his homosexuality. I also realised that he was very tense. I had been given a kind of premonition to help me understand this brother's behaviour when the time came. I needed I; indeed I found it very helpful - it made it easier to deal with him and to put his behaviour into perspective. After some time I moved abroad and I haven't seen him since. I pray that his life might become easier. Over the years I was made aware of other Subud brothers who struggled with the same issue. - - - - - |
The Ribbon of Light
By a Daughter of the Merciful One it was still very early in the morning and I'd just returned from cardio-walk. I was affixing a post to concrete and checking with a level but decided to step back to see how it looked. My heel caught on a 20-pound block and stopped while I kept going, landing on a hip. From there, I bounced off the concrete and landed face down in the gravel, pointing the other direction, toward the house. I also hit my head and a huge lump came on my eyebrow. Day one was spent crawling to the house and, once inside, I travelled slowly on elbows and knees. By not taking the pain into my inner feeling, I was able to see the damage within. Nothing was broken or dislocated. There's much to be said for good nutrition and staying alkaline. An old injury had left adhesions and they were shattered, plus new tares. In less than two weeks, there has been an enormous amount of healing, and at this point the story takes a most unusual turn. I was told that the enormous suffering was necessary before I could enter another dimension. As a kind of super purification? I have no idea. Then yesterday morning, I woke early feeling peaceful and well-rested. The concussion brain fog was gone, and I entered a portal. beyond which I could see a glorious dawning but was told I couldn't go there. The experience ended and I was left with a feeling of lightness and joy. I was told that I must never allow anything to obscure the vision I was now having of a ribbon of light connecting myself with the portal. I felt the experience was about a new kind of helper work that would reveal itself in time. Back to earth, there is much healing to do and work to be completed. Bought a pair of crutches for short people and am trying to practice the art of walking - you know, that thing we automatically do. - - - - - A Test of Patience By Anonymous These are extraordinary times, and this minor event in our Subud world will go unnoticed. For the person concerned, however, it was no minor event as he had waited a long time for it, over sixty years of regular latihan. He was a dedicated Subud member who had served Subud well, now in his nineties, the oldest male member in our group. But something was missing in that he never experienced anything when "testing" was done. Not once in his lifetime, even at world congresses. We were one of the oldest and a very large group at one time. Bapak, Ibu Rahayu and International helpers have visited us regularly. We are a small group now, and I am one of the older helpers in the group. This member would often ask me "Why is it that I cannot receive like the others?” My reply was the usual, “You have to relax and surrender, let go of everything.” I was aware how important it was for him in the last stage of his life to experience the proof of the latihan. I felt for him, but who would question the wisdom of the Almighty. What mystified me most was that recently his latihans were almost spontaneous. Two weeks ago he asked the same question and just the two of us tested, which is not normal. The exact words were “Relax, X, receive the condition or state when it is HEAVY.” And again, the state when it is LIGHT. This timee got it! He was stunned and overjoyed. At his request, we tested again a week later. On this occasion I had another helper as a witness, and it was another question but still heavy or light. It worked again. The impossible had happened and who is to question why and why not. I am grateful to be a witness to this event and this old member's joy overflows with the praise of the Almighty. - - - - - Now You See It, Now You Don’t By Anonymous An old friend recently told me that many years ago a Subud member she knew who'd had a nervous breakdown years before she was opened, told her that she'd taken a large kitchen knife with the intention of stabbing her abusive husband when he came home from work. There was a knock at the door so she put the knife behind a curtain and answered the door. It was a woman, a stranger and I don't remember what she said about the caller, but after they talked and the woman had left, the knife had disappeared. My friend and the lady concerned both thought that this must have been an angelic intervention. This incident reminded me of the time when a Subud brother, a wine dealer, visited Ibu Sumari (Bapak’s then wife) during a stay at Wisma Subud in Jakarta. He had taken with him a bottle of fine wine as a gift for Ibu, and he was in the process of presenting it to her when they heard Bapak’s footsteps approaching down the corridor. Ibu hastily secreted the bottle behind some books on the bookshelf and Bapak joined them for a few minutes. When he left, they looked in vain for the bottle of wine. It had vanished. - - - - - Seeking Subud By Mardijah Simpson Long ago when I was young and had met Ramdhan in London - we had both been raised in the Anglican Church but felt there was something more to take us on our spiritual path. We talked, read books on Zen, Ospensky and much more, visited Quakers and other spiritual groups, but none seemed right for us. One day in the 1960s ,sitting in a big red bus as it swept around by Marble Arch, we read the newspaper together. There was a dramatic story of a man from the east who had healed a well-known actress. We read it, but the style of the journalism sounded too sensational for us. Time passed. We moved to South London in 1962, joined the local public library but found only astrology and numerology in the spiritual section. One morning on the radio, a woman was interviewed on her recently published book; “A Fool in Love”. She explained she had had a profound spiritual experience but felt she had to write a book about her life leading up to this experience, so that readers would understand. I bought the book - by Kitty Trevelyan - I read it lying on the grass, out in our back garden, over several days. It was interesting but exactly what had happened to Kitty seemed unclear. I felt sad that I could not find her answer. We had been writing fiction and poetry at that time. I wrote a poem, typing it out on my little mauve portable. Short, but seeking, trying to clarify what was happening in my spiritual quest. I put it safely in a folder Later we moved into London in 1963, finding a small flat in Chelsea. The public library there had a trove of spiritual books. Running my finger along the shelf I stopped at “The Path of Subud” by Hussein Roffe. I had never heard those names before, to my knowledge. I flipped through a few pages and realised that the writer had sought and found his spiritual path. I borrowed the book and over the next week or so Ramdhan and I took turns to read it through. Ahead of me, one day, Ramdhan looked up and said “If this is true, it is what we had been searching for". As I read on I felt sad as all the events seemed to be far away in Asia and we were stuck in London but towards the end of the book my heart lightened as Subud was brought to England. Soon after I went up the street to the red phone box and rang the book's publishers. I asked where the Subud people could be found and was given the address of a hall in Monmouth Road. Within days I caught a bus there - it was quite close by. I met Roseanna (June) Sawrey Cookson and signed the application form. Ramdhan went to talk to the men helpers and was opened. Then I was opened in April 1964. The gift of the latihan and the activities of Subud have been the foundation of my life ever since. One evening a few years later a group of us were talking about Subud writers and books in the hall at Monmouth Road. Somebody mentioned Kitty Trevelyan and "A Fool in Love". I piped up - "I read the book but it never named or gave details of Subud". Others assured me that I was wrong - it was all there. I was so puzzled I checked out the book, and there it was, around the middle of the book, two pages describing Kitty finding a joining Subud. I was bemused. All I could think was that during those days I lay in the grass reading, I must have stopped at one part and the next day, jumped the next two pages and continued reading, missing the very part I had been searching for. I thought how odd it was, but realised that if we had learned of Subud at that time it would have been almost impossible to trek into London and Monmouth Road, whereas moving to Chelsea - in itself an unexpected miracle - had made it possible. The timing had to be right. In 1970, on Bapak's advice we migrated to Australia with our baby son and just a few possessions. We gave away most of our books to London friends. I kept my folder of poems. A long time later on browsing through and re-reading the poem written in 1962, I was surprised to realise it exactly described my search for the latihan. Over the years I have kept the poem safe but it often 'disappears' among my papers, especially when I think it might be ready to publish or share. I found it once more - yesterday - about 59 years after it was written. Here it is. The game of blind man's buff is nearly over Any second, any year the scarf will be ripped off, and the bluffing will be over I shall see the truth, But now, fumbling through time Feeling with fingertips from corner to edge, Circling in the trap of everyday Subconsciously or consciously avoiding the door Because I cannot see it,but I know it must be there, The brightness is waiting and if I cannot unscarf myself The white heat will shrivel it up and - - - - - |