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The Healing Heart of Christ
By Anonymous This experience occurred during a late night latihan at a National Congress. It was completely unexpected, as I was very tired after a long day and the room was exceptionally crowded, so in truth I did not expect to experience anything at all in the latihan. But I went anyway and was there in a corner, choc-o-bloc full of bodies of people latihaning, so close together that it was even hard to move. Yet this extraordinary thing happened. I must have been taken into another level of reality for I heard whispers indicating to me the presence of invisible spiritual beings; they were saying, as if to inform: “It is her heart which needs attention.” Suddenly, Jesu was there. He literally pressed his sacred heart against my heart, transmitting energy. When this was finished, he said “that will carry you to the end of your life.” Then, he threw his arm around my neck – with a fierceness of heart – that was totally recognizable as Jesu Christu. It seemed as if was in a hurry and working very hard; his spirit conveyed earnestness. I felt treated as if I were a co-worker and very familiar with him, obviously, since he embraced me. Then he ascended upward, quickly; saying, “I’ll return for you,” as he went. That was the experience – apparently aimed at healing whatever was wrong in my heart – for I had been feeling extraordinarily weary for quite a long period beforehand. He healed my heart, I do believe. At least well enough to continue for as long as I am required to. He said so. - - - - - On Cosmic Consciousness By Michael Rogge In 1953, when I was 23, I worked for a Dutch bank in Hong Kong, It was dull, routine work. At lunchtime I retired to the staffroom to eat my sandwiches. As I was doing so in an quiet state of mind I was suddenly overcome by what seemed a glorious spiritual light. I submitted to it and felt immersed in its glow. It took me further into a state of heavenly compassion. I went with its flow and felt one with the universe. It lasted only for a few minutes, but did not disappear. It lingered on, and returned at various times. Even in the street. I felt then as floating in the air. The phenomenon was not entirely new to me. My mother was a Theosophist and took me to their children’s Lotus circle to learn about the essence of the great religions and the great sages. In their literature the spiritual nature of man (and woman!) was often emphasized. By pureness and cultivation of intuition the 'higher self' could be awakened. I tried to direct my life according to these principles. But in a metropolis like Hong Kong there was so much diversion. In 1949 I had met the great scholar John Blofeld by answering an appeal to form a Buddhist study group. I was the only person to respond. Blofeld could only encourage the young chap who appeared on his doorstep of a small lodging on a hillside in Shatin with little or no experience and knowledge. Later, a few years after my experience, I wondered how I could keep it alive; and were there other people who experienced such a thing? In 1954, I had seen an ad in the newspaper to form a workgroup in the Gurdjieff movement, but again, I turned out to be the only respondent amongst the millions of inhabitants. The ad appeared to have been placed by a foremost authority in the colony, the chief-commissioner of police. In his function he did not wish to reveal his interests to the general public and asked me to act for him by placing a letter to the editor appealing to form a group of people to discuss spiritual matters. I received a few letters, including a remarkable one from Husein Rofé. He mentioned that he had come into contact in Indonesia with Muhamad Subuh who had power for man/woman to come into contact with their inner nature. In his Subud movement there was supposed to be no teacher, teaching or method. I met Rofé and was impressed by his personality and intelligence. He was a linguist who was waiting in Hong Kong for a visa to return to Indonesia. I decided to give it a try, but the initiation did not bring back my former cosmic awakening experience. The commissioner, who was anxious to hear my experience, decided not to embark on Subud and continued with Gurdieff. I went ahead in Subud, but kept on cherishing the memory of my initial spiritual experiences, which had almost disappeared. I valued the Javanese spiritual latihan exercises, although they were of a different nature. However, the initial awakening experience returned to me in old age. Now I can go deeper and deeper within, on rare occasions experiencing the Divine. - - - - - In Response to Mardijah By Rohana Darlington I felt I’d like to respond to Mardijah Simpson’s contribution, as her experiences of finding Subud in London in the 60’s chimed with mine. I too was a member of the Central London Subud group then, attending the Monmouth Road building for Latihan, although I don’t recall meeting Mardijah there. We had Latihan in shifts on different days as there were so many members then so we didn’t all get to meet each other. At the time I was a teenage trainee working in a prestigious London publishing company where one of the directors was Kitty Trevelyan’s brother George. Kitty’s book A Fool in Love had just been published by a different publisher, but my employers were fascinated by Kitty’s description of Subud and it was a hot topic of conversation as they tried to find out more about it from Kitty’s brother. One of our authors was Aldous Huxley who’d already been opened in Subud, so they wanted to learn more. Soon after its publication I attended a Christmas office party there, and as I was very shy then I stood by the drinks table hoping no-one would notice me, trying to make myself useful helping people with their drinks. Suddenly I found myself surrounded by the very high-powered team of directors, all internationally famous, discussing Kitty’s remarks about Subud, offering their opinions on how peculiar the Latihan sounded, but talking as if I was invisible. Something in me forced me to contradict them! I heard myself speaking up for Subud saying something along the lines of ‘the Latihan isn’t peculiar, its really good and helps to turn you into a good person eventually.’ The directors all looked in astonishment at me, this insignificant 19-year old trainee who dared to say she knew more than they did. They asked me how I knew about it and I said I was a member. They all seemed embarrassed then and changed the subject as they walked off to a different part of the room. So I was interested to read Mardijah’s description of these times, and to ponder on the fact that we’re now both old ladies still receiving our latihans so many years later. - - - - - Education Through the Latihan By Anonymous As a child beginning school, I had an experience like a message which could be described as a 'child level' epiphany. I'm elderly now, but the feeling of it and the memory of it is still clear in every way. Eventually I came to understand that this experience was connected to Bapak and the expanding of the early Subud Brotherhood. Because I'd been reading since I was three years old, I did well in the first year at primary school and was top of the class, but went steadily downhill after that. I don't know if it was connected to the 'experience', but afterwards I could only focus on subjects that were in tune with my nature or in accord with my stages of development so I sketched portraits of classmates during those lessons which were incompatible. For this reason I was partly home-schooled by my mother because I couldn't absorb maths. My father who was well educated, didn't believe girls needed to achieve academically (this was the 1940s) and encouraged me in a different direction in which we played competitive games involving intuition. His belief that everything was pre-ordained and that trust in God was paramount, dominated his life. Only art interested me and I longed to attend art school, but wasn't allowed. Immediately after being opened in my twenties, two great longings engulfed me. Although I was Protestant, suddenly I thirsted for Catholicism and I longed for a university education to study genetics. Until I was opened, neither of these paths had been of any interest to me, but in fact they were connected to the ancestors of my parents After becoming a helper in my early thirties, I found that knowledge was entering me and in the Latihan I was being educated and shown things I did not know. It went deeper and manifested in my thinking and in my heart. This took place over several years and I felt filled with knowledge and insight into character and understanding of Psychology developed strongly. Eventually, I felt as though (inwardly only) I had a minor degree in Communications and a major degree in Psychology! From an uneducated dull person I became alert; the heart and mind directed by the inner self knew what to do and exquisite synchronicity in everyday life became possible. Sometimes when I had an 'indication' it then manifested in reality. This help from the invisible world became a regular feature in my later career life and I could put what was received in the Latihan into practice in the world. |
Eventually, in my 40s, I participated in formal study and became what my
family described as a diploma junkie. The outer now had to catch up with the inner in order to participate in the world and have a career. I eventually rounded out my education and applied for and succeeded in career positions which I'd been prepared for by the Latihan until finally, in retirement, I became an art student at university. There are wants and there are needs and now that my 'wants' are more in line with my 'needs' (which the Latihan so mercifully provides for) life feels peaceful and blessed. Thank you God and Bapak. (Writing this is inspired by listening to a CD of beloved Bapak singing strongly during a talk in Cilandak on 18 March 1979 (79 CDK 8) among other things, this song is about "Have confidence and faith in Almighty God so that you can be shown things that you do not know.") - - - - - That which is to come By Anonymous I let God into the room through a fairly small window, high up in the room. He was in the form of a sphere, sort of radio-active, glowing and pulsing with power. He approached me, but stopped a couple of feet away until, at a sign of assent from me, he entered my body and merged with me. This caused the whole universe, including me, to “split” asunder and cease to exist. In a nanosecond, though, I was somehow there again, and He presented me with two tasks. I was unclear as to the meaning of the first, symbolized by three white ivory marshal’s batons, because as I looked at them He immediately presented me with the second task. This was in the form of three large, leather-bound volumes, containing all His knowledge, wisdom and plans for the world. Task number two was to translate these books and make them available to the world. The few companions who were with me were very excited to see which job I would choose to do first. For my part, I was deeply, deeply quiet and empty, filled with a genuine humility and thanking Him over and over again for entrusting me with such an awesome task. I came to and sat on the edge of the bed, feeling very awake and aware, feeling very alive and purposeful, feeling that the experience was a precursor of something that is to come. - - - - - He Effect of the Latihan By Lucas Horton The latihan is one thing, Subud is something else. It’s the latihan (or the Grace of God coming through the latihan) that does the work, not a committee or a dewan of helpers. I once did this test What effect has the latihan had in the world? I felt it was enormous and its influence ongoing. What effect has Subud had in the world? I felt it was negligible. Also, many years ago I had this experience, that I have talked about elsewhere, where I was shown that Bapak’s legacy was ‘out in the world’ and was not owned or controlled exclusively by Subud or Subud members. So if that is all true then the latihan has this effect in the world by us being ‘open to Grace’ which we don’t need to think about. The latihan follows us wherever we go. I believe that is how it was for Bapak: he went round the world many times and maybe the effects of the latihan penetrated deep into the peoples and places that he travelled to. I have noticed something similar in the effects of the latihan on those close to me, brothers, sisters, children, parents, colleagues, none of whom have joined Subud but who have felt ‘Grace’ in their lives. All have shied away from joining the organisation of ‘Subud’ but who have nevertheless been touched by God’s Grace in their lives. I live now on the borders of Ireland and Northern Ireland and although I am not claiming anything important personally, the ‘atmosphere’ in this border area is peaceful and prosperous. It was not always so as 40 years ago I was an Architect here doing bomb damage work at the height of the ‘Troubles’. The other requirement of life is to be active. Putting human energy behind God-given talent. That’s our job as human beings being ‘open to Grace’ whilst being ‘active in the world’ and not to think too much about mixing the two, or about outcomes of either. So it is my understanding that the world is currently being transformed by the latihan and that major change is always accompanied by some level of suffering. So we shouldn't focus on the suffering; we should be open to the changes. This has certainly been true for me personally and I feel it is just as likely to be true for humanity and the world at large. - - - - - The Voice of Oneness By Anonymous For years, decades even, although my outer ’self’ of mind and heart was often far from being in accord with the sentiment, I have found myself saying in the Inner, “I am happy and joyful in the Lord.” Of late, however, when the Inner Self gives voice in this way, it is speaking for the whole being. It is the voice of Oneness. - - - - - The Man on the Beach By Anonymous I'm British, but when I was making my living as a painter in the sixties, my place of residence was the island of Formentera off the coast of Spain from which I used to cross to the island of Ibiza to sell my work to tourists. In those days, Formentera was a haven for Hippies and cultural refugees from many countries. Apart from that, there were just a few peasants there, wresting a hard living from the arid windblown land. Most of us were seeking our spiritual path and thought that mind-altering drugs were the way to it. As it emerged, though, such drugs merely took us over and so became the path for a time. Interestingly, many of the people I met there, I later met in Subud. We were searching, and God eventually found us. One day, I tried LSD and, in that state, took a walk along a deserted beach. I walked along breathing in the local mythology of Formentera as "the point where life emerged from the sea." I was in a timeless place and this beach, Playa Mitjorn, seemed to me to be receiving my footprints for the first time in its several million years of development. I felt I was Adam. You can imagine my shock when I was confronted with a fully formed, modern man in a gabardine raincoat and tie, accompanied by two small boys dressed in English school uniforms! They all looked so out of place. What were they doing in Eden? The man smiled, greeted me in a courteous manner and said, "Would you like to join me for a drink at this bar?" He indicated a bar behind a palm tree. I would have missed it I think. "I'll be along in a minute," he said, and then he went away. There, behind the indicated tree, in this Jurassic proto Eden, stood a bar, complete with white-jacketed and bow-tied barman. It just sat there in the bush, next to the beach. There were no roads, paths or other buildings in sight. I was stunned. I believe I had an orange juice, but the whole experience was so irrelevant to my two billion year old cortical walk on the beach that I got the horrors and fled! Years later after I was opened in Subud, I discovered that the legendary Ronimund (Hubert) von Bissing, author of that wonderful book Songs of Submission which I was given to read as a probationer, had at that time built an hotel on Formentera which was then a remote outpost of Europe sticking out into the Mediterranean. This was three years before Formentera even had electricity. I would like this to be a tribute to Ronimund, who, without saying a word, influenced my future choices. I wish that I'd been there when he returned to have that drink with me. I missed what would have been an introductory talk about Subud straight from the horse's mouth. As it was, it was years later, through his writing, that I finally caught up with ‘the man on the beach.’ Songs of Submission is now being read on the SICA-USA website on this link. https://sica-usa.org/news/the-songs-of-ronimund-von-bissing/ - - - - - |